Letter #1

What kind of a hateful, sick man were you that you would even think of harming innocent children. How dare you lay your hands on your own son! He was an innocent child and you took away his dignity. Anyone could have walked into that room that night and seen what I saw. But fate or blind luck or whatever you want to call it led me to be the witness. I was two years old, still a baby and I didn't know what it was that I saw then, but I do now. Then all I knew was that it was bad because you yelled at me and hit me.

What gave you the right to think that once I was a witness, it was okay to make me a victim?

You hurt me in ways you cannot possibly imagine. Every time I have a sciatic nerve problem, every problem I've had with my hips, my back and so forth can really be traced back to those four times that you took me and abused me.

My fears of men, my nightmares were all caused by this abuse. When I learned about sex, I had nightmares I could not explain until I remembered what had happened to me.

You are lucky that you are dead, because I don't think that there is a statute of limitations on child abuse.

I imagine that you never thought I would remember what had happened. You never thought that a 2 1/2-5 1/2 year old could retain these memories until a time that she could understand what had happened to her.

Obviously, you never considered children to be real people, or whhy would you have harmed any of them in this manner.

It makes me wonder if there were more than two children that you harmed. If any of the others in the family, or outside of the family suffered from this abuse.

Let me tell you something that you obviously did not know. I am a person and I am a unique individual. I never deserved to be hurt, never deserved to be sexually assaulted or abused by anyone. I should have been given the respect that any child deserves. I should not have been harmed.

You had no right whatsoever to touch me, to rape me. You didn't have the right to judge me as unworthy of respect. You had no right to treat me as a piece of meat. You had no right to take away my rights.